If your name was homework, i'de be doing you on my desk right now
Children in the dark cause accidents, accidents in the dark cause children
My daughter just asked if she could borrow 20 bucks. I gave her Monopoly money and she took it without questions. Iím wondering where I went wrong as a parent.
If I had a dollar for every time I showed up to work on time and did a good job, I would have no dollars.
I noticed that salary and slavery sound so much alike.
How to shut people up: Step 1: Let them start talking (preferably telling a story) Step 2: In the middle of the story say "cool story bro". Step 3: watch them shut the F**K up.
Raisin cookies that look like chocolate chip cookies are the reason that I have trust issues.
Like my status and I'll tell you what's your best feature.
Like this status and ill say the first word that comes to my mind when i hear your name ♥
Like my status if you want to stay on my friends list!